“Despite my prayers, meditation and good intentions, I failed to contain my emotions when provoked recently.”
Let me share a tennis example so you can understand what happened there. I taught my younger brother how to play tennis when he was a boy. I hit the ball to him really hard, as if he was an adult, because I thought if he could take the speed of my shots he could easily beat other people his age.
This is how I used to teach him, and he got quite good.
Many years later, when he was about 15 years old, we played a set together. I wasn’t playing tennis myself at that time, and he beat me six-love, even though I tried my best!
So, of course you’re going to bomb out in that situation, the way I bombed out, because you haven’t practiced observing your mind and disbelieving your mind. As a matter of fact, you’ve practiced the opposite—you’ve spent a whole lifetime believing your mind.
When you want to sleep, your mind says, “I need to sleep, but I’ve got so much to do tomorrow. I haven’t finished this or that… Don’t sleep yet, I’ve got to get this ready, I’ve got to get that ready…” You love it!
You do everything your mind tells you and when you finish the things on that list, you ask, “Are there any other lists to go through?” By then it’s already 4 o’clock in the morning.
If you spend a whole lifetime loving the mind, then of course in the critical moment you’re going to bomb out in this sport of disbelieving it.
There’s nothing you can do in that moment. Like me—I tried my best, but my brother beat me six-love. I wasn’t embarrassed or disappointed at all, because I knew the nature of life. I knew I hadn’t played tennis for years so the result was to be expected. It’s normal.
In other words, you shouldn’t be surprised that you couldn’t control your anger or emotions. You’ve spent years and years believing your mind, nearly 24 hours a day.
Even in your dreams, you believe everything—the mind suggests things that you haven’t fulfilled while you’re awake and you try to fulfill them in your dreams. So, looking at it objectively, without any judgment, the outcome is normal. We shouldn’t be surprised by that.
Now, if you spent 24 hours a day practicing to dis-identify with the mind, learning from a Master who teaches you how to see the invisible nature of the mind, and you still bomb out in that moment—then that would be alarming. That would be a surprise. But you haven’t. You’ve hardly embarked on it.
What you’ve learnt is only theory. It’s just words. But you need to know how to see the invisible, how to see thoughts, because in actual practice the words and theories can’t do anything. So practice in advance, and make sure you’re practicing the right way—learn from a Master of mind control. Then the anger can’t get you.